BOOya! Scary Images For Halloween! (w/ apologies to Steve Bartman)

Holocaust Denial

Predators

Guns at Obama rallies

The Healthcare Reform Debate

Cowboy Diplomacy

Sarah

Fate/What If?

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Guess What–I joined the GOP!!

From my Facebook page. It's so weird to see it in writing like that.

My friend Bob got me all cyber-drunk tonight after I bumped into him on Facebook. Next thing I knew it, I had become a fan of the Republican Party of Wisconsin’s Facebook page. See, there’s the proof at the top of this post–a screen capture from my Facebook page.

Bob lives up in Wisco, and he’s a Liberal. So when I saw that he had joined this grand ol’ group, i first needed to recover from throwing up in my mouth a little. But right after that, I found out why.

The GOP of WI’s FB page only allows “fans” to post comments to their wall. So Bob became a fan, and using a modern-day kinda Trojan Horse strategy he infiltrated the enemy’s stronghold. Now Bob’s up there going all commando on the Wisconsin Republican Party.

“Go check it out. I just surf some of the postings and add a comment or two,” he wrote to me. “I like to use phrases like ‘George Bush’ and ‘trillion dollar deficit.’ Go there. You can hop around and throw in comments on all their idiotic anti-Obama ranting.”

So I checked it out:

T

Hmmmmm…maybe flossing with the neo-cons can be kinda fun?

Political Football

"Pelosi takes the snap and hands off to Reid...he's looking for the hole..."

Politics, like football, seems to be a game of inches. It takes a team of people working under enormous pressure, against an equally enormous foe, to move their agenda forward towards the goal. Every inch in that direction is a test of will, determination, and strength. Pride, ego, validation, and ultimately money are on the line. Every inch forward is vital because progress for one side is regression to the other. Glory goes to those who win, because the fight is hard. People get injured along the way. Inch, by tormented inch.

But football, unlike politics, is an honest game. Put aside gambling, cheating, and Terrell Owens crying about Tony Romo for a moment, and consider this: when two football teams step onto the field they are both trying to beat hell out of each other. The Bears hate the Packers. The Jets hate the Patriots. Everyone hates the Raiders. The mission is clear: our team must win.

In politics we get this phony attempt at bi-partisanship, which is just a ploy to make the American public feel good about ourselves. Voters pull the lever for the politician that supports the issues that are important to that him or her. And I am sure “kumbaya” is not on anyone’s top-10 list of most important issues right now.

Don’t get me wrong, I am all for a happy nation where everyone is getting theirs. I would like all Americans to be able to agree on some basic things like guns, abortion, human rights, and never letting Tom Delay dance in public again. But that’s not what America is all about. America is really all about football.

Why not just ram the ball through the opposition's weak defensive front?

In the Healthcare Reform Legislation Bowl the Democrats are the home team. They have the crowd mostly behind them. They have a great quarterback (Obama) who knows how to move the ball. Their offense (House of Representatives) is superior, but their defense (Senate) is pretty evenly matched against the GOP because of some weak spots in the lineup (Lieberman, Nelson, Conrad).

The Republicans are the underdogs in this game. They don’t have the numbers in the House to lineup against the Democrats, but they can score points off their own offense in the Senate by overpowering the Democrats’ porous secondary. In football this would be called the Blue Dog Offensive Scheme.

The Democrats are playing this too conservatively. Rather than playing to avoid mistakes or fumbles, they should just take the ball and play smash-mouth. Break through the GOP’s weak defense against a public option, and outrun them to the end zone.

In other words Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi and her housemates have put out a bill on healthcare reform. The bill is now in your hands. If the Bluedogs like Lieberman, Nelson, and Conrad are gonna let the GOP run all over you in the Senate then use the power of cloture–you have the numbers for that. Get your team together on a bill that delivers what ALL DEMOCRATS said they’d do before the 2008 election, ram it through and do what you gotta do to get it on the President’s desk for a signature. If it upsets the GOP and their supporters, I can assure you that the voters will let you know if that’s a problem or not. 2010 is around the corner, and the voters will all have something to say on election day. Win this game now and you might just dominate for a long time. Losing it means losing many Democratic voters, your job, and likely losing control of the congress in a year.

Democrats were elected to run this country right now, and I want the agenda I voted for. NO COMPROMISES! Democrats, if you get an inch in this debate, turn it into a 55-yard kick return and take it all the way to the house–The White House.

Remembering W

Remember this guy? He used to be the POTUS. Remember how we were first introduced to this jamoke as “W”? Remember how adorable that Texas charm and aw shucks humility seemed like exactly what we needed after Bubba and his antics? Remember how W was the kind of guy voters wanted to have a beer with–except that he gave up drinking precisely because he used to be too much of that kind of guy.

Remember how it took all those judges at the Supreme Court to promote W to President? Remember hanging chads and people down in Florida counting votes just to make sure we elected the “right guy”. Remember Al Gore’s concession speech? Remember how Al had this bizarre smile on his face? He was smiling because he realized that America had become Bizarro World.

Remember how W used to pronounce “nuclear” as “nook-yoo-ler”? Remember how that was okay–how for EIGHT YEARS the man with his finger on the button couldn’t (wouldn’t) even correctly pronounce the physics behind the most powerful weapons on earth? Remember how it undermined his scary “Axis Of Evil” speech and almost made you giggle whenever he said nookyooler? No? Am I the only person who giggled?

I remember how excited W got whenever he went on vacation to the “Western Whitehouse”. Like it was a fucking Presidential Spring Break or something. Or World Leaders Gone Wild. Remember W out in his Texas ranch brush chopping cedar wood and driving ATVs? Remember watching football, choking on a pretzel, and passing out? No? Maybe you were too busy fighting his wars. Or scrambling in the shambles of W’s destruction of the middle class. Or getting depressed watching his ridiculous, color coded, Terrorist-threat-level warning system change colors more often than an old RCA television from 1981?

Remember Torture? Remember W’s scary little friend whom he called Cheney? That guy never said anything. He just had his secret meetings in his secret locations with his secret CIA pals and he never said anything. At least not until he got out of office. Now he won’t shut the fuck up!

Remember how W would get all up on his hackles whenever he talked to that guy over in North Korea–how W always seemed to like to call Kim Jong Il’s bluff and refuse to talk until he wanted to follow W’s rules of engagement? I remember how the whole world hated America and how I started working on my Canadian accent.

Remember Iraq and Afghanistan? I do because we’re still dealing with it. W isn’t but we are.

Remember how W took all those trips to Texas, and he only went to Israel once? W only went to Israel once. At the end of his Presidency. The Israeli/Palestinian conflict is at the center of the main reason why Al Qaeda attacked us on 9-11. And W only went to Israel once. Remember how nobody said a goddamned thing about it?

Remember Katrina and New Orleans and the Gulf Coast? W forgot all about them. But he remembered to tell Brownie that he was doing a “great” job.

Remember how the economy started to implode just before W went away? Almost like he knew it was coming and he was just gonna slip out the back door before the shit hit the fan?

I remember W. For eight long years I was embarrassed to say I was an American because of W. For eight long years I felt like an outsider in my own country. For four long years I counted every day until the 2004 election…then for four more years I dreaded the 2008 election, fearing we were destined to elect another moronic, obnoxious, elitist, corrupt jerk like W.

Let’s remember W, so we never make a mistake like him again.

Where did you go, Barry-O?

Remember “Fired up“? Remember “Yes We Can”? Remember kicking McCain’s ass? I remember all of it, but how long ago that all seems now.

Mr. President, I didn’t vote for you to make friends. I voted for you to push through OUR AGENDA. Healthcare for all. End the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. Kick the Republicans and their culture of “no” to the curb. Dude–you’ve got a mandate. USE IT!

Sure I’d like to hear you say I will veto any healthcare bill without a public option. I want to hear you say Our strategy in Afghanistan is X, Y, and Z and my Generals on the ground say we need to commit this many troops to execute that strategy. I want to hear you say Bluedog Democrats–the GOP will embrace you but I will not. And I want to hear you say, just once, The bailouts saved our butts.

But whatever you say, say it with some anger. Say it with a little bit of impatience. Because I am growing angry and impatient with all the niceties and dreams of bipartisanship. You are change I can believe in–but please don’t change into a wimp! Democrats have the majority right now, so steamroll the opposition while you can. That’s what W did for eight years.

Go back and check out some of your campaign speeches and get your swagger back. It’s okay–no one is gonna take away your Nobel Peace Prize. Just be the Barry-O I voted for again, because the guy who is getting roughed up in the opinion polls is starting to look like just another politician. You are a once in a lifetime guy for people like me, but I expect you to get things done or at least make me feel like you are as upset with the way things are as I am.

Because as much as I love you, Barry-O, there’s a guy named Alan Grayson down in Florida who is saying all the things I want to hear right now. He’s got the swagger. He’s got the attitude. And he sounds FIRED UP!

Is There Anybody Out There?

Sounds like that creepy voice from Pink Floyd’s The Wall, right? Well, that’s exactly what this first entry feels like–creepy.

Is anybody gonna read this blog except me? Am I gonna piss-off some gun-toting wacko (that didn’t take long)? Am I gonna write 11 entries and then get bored or distracted, and have this digital evidence to my lack of commitment left out there in the blogosphere for all eternity?

The only way to answer those questions is to just start wrting.

Voting Mad is a blog about politics, politicians, and their effect on people–specifically the American citizens. I have a point of view that will be the tone and personality of this blog:

• I have been Voting Mad since I cast my first vote for Dukakis in 1988–I wanted Cuomo, but he never ran.
• I think Voting Mad is perfectly okay–these are fucked up times in the good ol’ USA, and there’s a lot to be pissed off about.
• I Vote Mad because I won’t get on the demonstration line. I yell at the TV, not at town hall meetings. I agree with Peter Tosh when he said, “I’ve got no time for generals or funerals.”  I’ll write and I’ll donate money, but I’ll get involved from a distance that protects me from getting shot or arrested.
• I am an open-minded Democrat with many Republican friends. I am an extremely loyal supporter of Barack Obama and his policies, and passionately resentful of the disasterous W/Cheney administration. However, I am convinced that the USA would benefit greatly from a credible, independent, moderate, 3rd political party.

My hope is that I can use this forum to get my churning-mad political views out of my system, and perhaps enlighten, entertain, or enrage a few readers here and there along the way.

Please send me comments–I might learn something.

Let’s get started: Joe Lieberman is an asshole.

Wow that felt good! But why would a Jew like me be mad at a Jew like Joe? Because Senator Lieberman is a traitor. The Democratic party made this guy. He was one Supreme Court disagreement away from being Al Gore’s Vice President. And now, when the Democratic party needs him to help push forward on a public option for healthcare reform he threatens to help the GOP fillibuster against it. What balls he has.

Yes I know, Joe is an “independent”. He’s not an “Independent” with an uppercase “I”, because there is no real Independent Party in America. You see, Bubbie Lieberman is what they call an “independent thinker”–beholden to no party. But shouldn’t I be lauding the guy for marching to the beat of his own Bar Mitzvah DJ? No. Joe likes to Caucus with the Democrats when it pleases him, and he likes his nice Homeland Security Chairmanship position (which he got by being in the majority party). But when we need this schmuck’s vote on a basic party platform issue he goes across the aisle. I’d have more respect for hm if he left the Democratic party and either became an out-of-the-closet Republican or started a legitimate Independent political party. Joe lost his Democratic cred when he supported John McCain, and it’s silly for Harry Reid to hold onto this guy so he can pretend he’s got a filibuster-proof majority. He doesn’t, and the healthcare debate is proving that every day.

Which brings me to a fundamental issue that will crop up in this blog from time to time: we need a real 3rd party in America. I don’t know that I would leave the Democrats for them, but a 3rd party will, as Rodney Dangerfield said in Caddyshack, “keep it fair.” Could I vote for Obama and an Independent congressperson? Definitely–all depends on the political views. But views are nothing unless they lead to action.

Regardless of party affiliation, I’d vote for anyone who believes in the following:

1. Keeping abortion safe, legal, and rare.
2. Outlawing 99% of the guns available. I am all for hunting, and self-defense. But only a criminal needs a semi-automatic weapon and armor piercing bullets. Find me a line in the Constitution about the right to pop a cap in someone’s ass and I might think differently.
3. Making Gay marriage legal everywhere. As long as two adults are in love with each other, what the hell is the difference? And none of this civil-union bullshit either. The divorce rate in the US is just over 50%, so there’s nothing so sacred about marriage anymore that two homosexuals are going to degrade the value of tying the knot. Heteros have taken care of that all by ourselves.
4. Make marijuana legal. Forget medical marijuana–I don’t want to pray for Glaucoma. I just want to smoke a bowl after a long day and not worry about going to jail. Is that too much to ask? Louis Armstrong once called a joint “a cigarette with a little booze in it”. Supposedly he smoked pot every day, and by any measure he had a pretty decent career. So can’t we just allow Phillip Morris and all the boys to mass-produce and market the product, then let the government tax the shit out of it so I can have the convenience of stopping by Dominicks on the way home to pick up a carton of kind bud? Let’s put the drug dealers out of business and let a real cartel like the tobacco industry take over.
5. Death penalty reform–I am confused. On the one hand, I’d execute a rapist myself and feel good about it. On the other hand, there’s a reason why The Innocence Project exists. There are definitely innocent people on death row, and there have definitely been innocent people executed by the government. What to do? If you could guarantee me that rapists and murderers would automatically NEVER be allowed out of prison, I could do without the death penalty. Lock ’em up and leave ’em there for the rest of their life. If Bernie Madoff can get 150 years for stealing money, how can a child rapist get out of jail ever? Kill ’em or keep ’em off the streets–let ’em back out if you can prove they’re really innocent.
6. Healthcare reform–end pre-existing condition exclusions, enact some measure of tort reform, and give me my fucking public OPTION. I may use it, I may not. But I want an option in case I ever lose my job. My family’s health shouldn’t be tied to my career anymore. And by the way, government-run programs work just fine for me–I’ve never had a problem at the DMV.

Well that’s enough for the first post. Hopefully someone made it this far and is willing to come back again for more. If there’s anybody actually out there reading this, I thank you for your time.